raising cocoa children in a bittersweet world
So, I received my grades for my first semester of Law School. Needless to say, I didn’t do as well as I would have liked. I was very disappointed in myself. I talked with my friends and family, and realized something very important. I did my best. Not, the “hang your head in shame at defeat” best, but the “you have a full life and made important balance choices” best. I realized that although I spent a lot of time reading, studying, and outlining, I also spent time helping my children with homework, going to classroom productions, and cheering for them at games.
My daughter struggles with articulation and language delays, and since she was my driving force behind my decision to attend law school, I would be remiss if I did not take the time to work with her, while I learn how to use the law to help all children in her predicament. Yes, I initially felt inadequate, and less intelligent. How did I not get A’s in every class I spent a lot of time studying? I could ponder that forever, but the grades would not change. I decided to not worry about what I did not achieve, and realize I did something amazing. I followed my dream AND was a mother who was present in her children’s lives. I was there to pick them up after their activities. I was at (as many) my son’s basketball games. I sat with my daughter each evening and worked with her on speech. I was in the waiting room when my daughter had surgery to improve her hearing. I watched my son open up about the life of a 4th grader. I attended every doctor appointment, and wiped tears of frustration at the dinner table.
The grades I did receive would not have been possible without my husband’s patience, home cooked meals, errands, and housework. Also, I had a sister who helped me with the children, so I could attend every class (with the exception of 1) the entire semester. I am truly blessed to be a mom who doesn’t have to worry about working right now, and can follow my dream. Above all, I am a mom who is showing her children that although sometimes dreams are deferred, they can be achieved.
Pray for me as I begin my spring semester this week. I plan to do better at not only law school, but being Mom.