Save the Drama for Your Mama

I’m starting to believe that I must have budding musicians/artists/actors on my hands. Because if I don’t, I’m a little…worried. See, my children have what some may call a flair for the dramatic. EVERYTHING in my home has a taste of drama.

“What’s drama?” asked my almost-five year old. “When you take something that’s a little deal, and make it into a great big deal,” I replied. And for my children, the time it takes to go from “little” to “big” is no time at all.

Take putting on their jackets. Both are adept at this seemingly mundane task. Particularly at holding the sleeve of their shirt in their hand, putting one arm in the jacket sleeve, reaching behind them, and repeating with the other arm. Little deal, right?

Not in my house. As soon as the idea of putting on the jacket has been planted in their heads, the drama begins. “But I don’t know where my jacket IS!” It’s in the same place it always is – either where you left it last, or hanging in the closet. Look for it. “Uhh, ohh, eww, ohh, ohhh, ummm…..I NEED HELP!” Doing what? We do this multiple times a day. Maybe if you weren’t leaned over the couch and actually standing up, the process of getting the jacket on would be easier. And all that moaning and groaning you are doing is wasting energy. *Now in almost perfect unison, but not quite so it’s really just noise* “Mommy, can you zip me up?” Sure. I start with one. Then the other asks the same exact question, standing right next to me. Do they need glasses? Can’t they see that I’m still zipping the other up? “But Mommy, I didn’t want you to zip it ALL THE WAY! Ohhh…..!”

***

The head teacher at the preschool has something new to tell me every week about my almost-five year old, something we need to work on. He sings to himself constantly; he always has a little ditty going. I tell him to be quiet, and he acknowledges he hears me, but the ditty is so unconscious, he’s right back at in in no time flat. He appears to be in his own world, but a world of drama in which other people exist, but as props for him. He wanders aimlessly, bumping into things and people. He touches everyone, leaning his whole body weight into them. “But Mommy…” is his favorite phrase as his head leads his body into my body. A sense of helplessness has overcome him lately.

***

My three year old yells. And yells. And when put in time out for yelling, she yells, “But I won’t do it anymore!” And when she’s not yelling, she’s expressing her undying love for you. Back and forth it goes with this child, who at one moment is crying because she didn’t get to say goodbye to Daddy before he left for work, but at the next moment is yelling about how I shouldn’t tell her to sit and eat her food because she doesn’t like when I say that to her. And after the time out that comes from that, she’s crawling all over me so she can kiss me and say, “Mommy, I love you.”

***

The crazy thing is that a lot of this drama, other people don’t see. I ask their other caregivers if the dramatics are as deep as they are at home, and other people say not quite. It seems the drama is saved for home, for me, and I don’t know what to make of it. Is home where the social experiment of raising children happens, and the only way you know if you are doing right is how they act on the “outside”? Are children supposed to act crazy at home, getting it out of their systems, abusing the ones they know love them most, and putting their best sides forward when out in the street? I certainly hope so, for that’s the only way I will survive this. At least 15 more years? Talk about needing help…

7 thoughts on “Save the Drama for Your Mama

  1. LOL!!! How adorable is ur 3 yr old??? Telling you “I love you Mommy” after she gets off punishment. My 2 yr old niece sings to herself ALL DAY LONG too! Every song that comes on TV (her channel Sprout), she knows the words to.

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  2. I absolutely 10000000% relate to this post.

    Garvey puts the D in drama. I swear…

    The latest thing is that he refuses to WALK. He literally dances down the street doing MJ moves. What’s worse is people egg him on like “go Michael!!!” and he just kicks it up.

    Do you know what its like to have him do the Smooth Criminal lean against cars and set off alarms??

    Or have him do a spin move in the middle of the crosswalk??

    I die.

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    1. I’d be happier if mine were doing the smooth criminal lean. Or busted out a hot spin and a crotch pull. That would be kinda dope. Mine just like to rub and touch everything like they are humans that were raised in the jungle and never saw a car before. And in crosswalks just all of a sudden play the game of not stepping on the white lines and jumping over them…but they forget that MY ARM is attached to their bodies. Sheesh…

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  3. LOL about Benee’s comment. Wow… it must be hard to deal with all this drama. I do think that in general kids are always at their worst at home and have pretty decent behavior outside the house. My parents and in-laws always say that their grandkids are nice until the parents arrive, then they begin whining and misbehaving, etc. It’s not fair, right? But I guess it’s the way things are with mothering/parenting. Sigh.

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  4. Oh, LaToya, it’s not just you. We have lots and lots of drama, too.

    Every morning, we have getting-dressed-drama, hair-brushing-drama, lotion-putting-on-drama, no-you-can’t-eat-a-bowl-of-cereal-in-the-car-drama, and put-your-jacket-on-drama. Oh, and I forgot the who-gets-to-open-the-door-drama. (And I agree–it’s a whole lot easier to help someone get dressed if they’re not draped over the couch or whatever. 🙂 )

    And that’s just the morning drama…

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  5. My daughter is the queen of drama at home. But she charms all of my friends, who are so impressed with her poise and maturity. Ha! If only they had to deal with her every day.

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  6. I’ve read this post a couple of times laughing and smiling each time! I don’t know why I didn’t post sooner. My child was KING of drama- smh- lol, even now he still has a little in him… He always kept it within boundaries though, cause he knew I wasn’t going to entertain too much… lol

    I too LOVE the imagery of MinaBean and her love declarations…hahahhaaaa

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